“R” House: locked in

On today’s episode we are doing a little bit of child-proofing. Stick around to watch the mamas install locks for lever door handles.  First, a word from our sponsor, Tenedores: the entertaining silverware that doubles as a toy. Make mealtime entertaining for at least one person at the table.

Okay, we’re back!  Thank you for joining us today.  We are so excited to have you with us as we go around the house on a  baby-proofing mission.  This is a very simple operation: adding lever locks to doors with–well– lever handles.

Before the show, we grabbed a few “Safety 1st” locks off of Amazon because they were the first things that popped up and didn’t seem much different than other choices.  Our attorneys are making us say that we cannot officially endorse shopping for baby supplies in this manner, especially child safety products.

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As a side note, please do not mind the black bars on Mama K; she decided not to wear clothes for this episode.  In reality, she was just changing the baby after her shower and I decided to get this little project out of the way.

Okay, step 1: unscrew the current door knob.  This should only take a few minutes.  It had better, because Mama C has to meet with  a friend in one hour.  Here we go!

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See these parts?  You will actually only need one of the three, but the other two are thrown in to make things really confusing.  That’s why it’s really important to watch trained professionals such as the Mamas R.

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Okay now that we’ve removed the handle, it’s really important to do one of two things:

  1. Make sure that not all members of the family (at least not all adults) are on the same side of the door, or
  2. Keep that door from closing because if the other side of the handle gets pushed out…

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Oh #@%*!.  Um, okay.  So now we have a baby, a Mama without clothes on and a Mama in pajamas.  All stuck in a baby room with no phones, no computers, and no way out.

Think, think, think.

Okay, folks.  We can open the window and yell for help or destroy the door.  Or, we can call our friends who live down the street.  And by “call” I mean text using the Apple Watch.  Apple is not an official sponsor, but this is an official statement of appreciation.  Ho-ly cow.

But first we accidentally FaceTime our other friend, because it’s just that sort of day.

“Are you up? I need help at my house it’s a long story but I need help immediately.”

Alright, now we have a neighbor (savior!) on her way.  If I wasn’t so stressed out, I might think it was cute that I literally texted her at 9:11 AM.  9-1-1.

Now what should we do with this naked co-host in a room full of baby clothes?  Hey, what do we have here?  A bag full of Goodwill donations that happens to contain some old (adult-sized) clothes.  Whew!  This morning could not get any weirder.

[10 minutes later] Well folks, our good neighbor L came over and only laughed at us a little bit.  It turns out that all she had to do is put the handle back into the lock mechanism so we could get out.  As a reward, Little Bug was social toward her and held her hand as they walked down the steps.

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The finished product

So that wraps up another episode of “R House.”  We hope you had fun and moreover, we hope that you learned a lesson from our follies. Just three more doors to go, and three more chances to lock myself in a room.

This is Mama C signing off.

Denied!
Denied!
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